Okay, so these guys were transporting a juvenile prisoner from Lexington to Scottsbluff… That’s a four-hour trip for those of you that aren’t in Nebraska. About halfway, the kid escapes during a bathroom break. I’m sure it has more to do with the ineptitude of his guards… But, I can’t help but picture this kid … Continue reading “Master Criminal…”
Okay, iPod… I’ll shuffle my songs. But, you better bring it… “Julianne” by Ben Folds Five? That’ll do. You may live… for now. This little exchange of insanity brought to you by our sponsors “8:00 a.m.” and “I need coffee”.
“Yeah, guys? Bad news. The KFC launch returned less than stellar results. Well, how was I supposed to know? Oh, I’m sure everyone says that… ‘a public execution by electric chair is a bad time to unveil our new roasted chicken’. Give me a break. I was trying to think outside the box.”
“You never pay any attention to me!” She screams, before walking out of the apartment and slamming the door. Thank God. Her incessant blathering was making it near impossible to hear my video game.
“You cheated on me!” She exclaims. “I can’t deal with this,” I reply. “I have to make my ski-jump. My country is depending on me.” In retrospect, I probably should have planned a better time for our marriage counseling appointment.
Barry: When was the last time Sega did us wrong? Me: Anything released in the last seven years with the name Sonic attached.
“I had just done a line of ‘coke’ off of Sweet Polly Purebread’s feet. I woke up in Beijing three days later, naked as the day I was born. I looked in the mirror and said ‘Shoeshine, man, what the f&%! are you doing with you life?!” – Exerpt, “Underdog: The Story Behind The Cape”
You know what would make Mass Effect 2 totally awesome? A cutscene with the antics of Benny Hill.
Has anyone ever choked to death on ice? And, if so, would the cause of death be listed as “drowning”? I think about this sort of thing a lot.
As the title implies, I am currently glued to my TV screen… Upon where I follow the adventures of one Commander Shepard. Though, I’m kind of confused. Commander Shepard is pronounced dead at the beginning of the game. (Spoiler alert… that was a spoiler.) Yet, when he shows up two years later, clearly not dead… … Continue reading “On the Mass of Effects Going On Here…”